The facts may be that we, as women, may have been superficial in our own understanding of what men see when they look at us. Rather than being superficial, it appears that men are super-perceptive.
When a woman expresses the playful aspect of her femininity (without the sensual or sexual), everyone is invited to participate. This quality is very charming, like a magical spell that makes life more fun for all.
Women are fortunate to often have many friends with Mother qualities and I believe we take them for granted. We don’t fully appreciate that nurturing is a distinctly feminine capacity and few men can count on receiving it from their male friends.
The Queen includes the qualities of vision and purpose for her life. She is generous and serene. Perhaps most importantly, she has an enormous capacity to receive. She is influential and powerful in a uniquely feminine way.
What is it that causes “the man of our dreams” to become our “worst nightmare?” Alison Armstrong relates her own experience as a woman whose magic wand went awry.
Over a decade ago, we began studying men with this question: What if men are responding to women? This newsletter is about one of the ways men are definitely not responding to women. This will bring relief from thinking you could have or should have done something differently.
Once, I had the pleasure of sharing an airplane ride with a magnificent young man on his way to a college recruitment visit. When I asked Aaron what he did for fun, he said, "videogames" and went on to explain how he had to be careful not to spend too much time at them. Writing this now, I can just imagine the groans coming from some women.
In 1991, I took a deep breath and said, “Okay. I’ll stop. I won’t emasculate men.” That was the end of the war between the sexes for me.